Doing Business Differently

About the Video:
In this video, Josh Patrick reflects on the all-too-common trap entrepreneurs fall into—starting a business to gain freedom and fulfillment, only to become consumed by it and lose precious time with their families. He shares his personal regrets about missing moments that truly mattered, urging viewers to honestly assess where their energy goes and redefine what success means beyond profit and growth. Patrick emphasizes setting and enforcing real boundaries, learning to switch between “business mode” and “human mode,” and accepting that prioritizing family may mean passing up some business opportunities. Ultimately, he reminds viewers that while new deals will always come, their children’s childhood and relationships cannot be reclaimed—so the time to start living differently is today.

Transcription:
You know the pattern because you're probably lived it. You start a business with big dreams. You're gonna build something meaningful,  create financial freedom, maybe even change your industry,  and you're definitely not gonna become one of those workaholics who missed their kid's childhood. Then reality hits   the business, demands everything you tell yourself.

It is just. Temporary just this quarter just this year, just until you get past this crucial growth phase.  Except the crucial growth phase never ends. And suddenly you're missing birthdays, school plays, and quiet bedtime conversations. You're checking your phone to dinner, you're mentally somewhere else,  even when you're physically printed.

Here's the really insidious part. You've justify it all as providing for my family  or building something for our future.  But here's the brutal truth I've learned from my own experience in watching hundreds of other business owners. Your kids don't need a bigger house or fancy vacations.

They need you. And by the time most of us figure that out, we've missed the years. We can  never get back. I can tell you from personal experience  at 73 that day comes faster than you think  and you're not going to wish you'd closed a few more deals. You're gonna wish you'd been there for the moments that actually mattered.

That's certainly true for me and it's something I truly regret. So let's have an honest assessment. So how do we work differently? First, get brutally honest about where your energy actually goes.  Track it for two weeks, not what you think you're doing, but what you're actually doing.  Many business owners and executives, mostly male I know, think they're giving their family maybe 60% of their time and energy. 

When they actually track it, they discover it's more like five or 10%.  The gap between perception and reality, that's where the work begins. You can't change what you won't acknowledge, and here's a question that'll mess with you.  What does success actually look like?  Is it just revenue and profit margins, or does include the quality of your relationships with your spouse, whether your kids seek you out for important conversations, your own physical and mental health.

So let's create some real boundaries. This is where most people fail.  They know they need boundaries. They talk about them.  They might even set them,  but they don't enforce them. A boundary without enforcement is just a good intention. Here's what real boundaries look like.  Pick specific times when you're completely off.

Not checking email, not taking calls. Actually off for me. That might be six to 9:00 PM on weeknights and all day Saturday. When you're home, be home. Put the phone in another room. Close the laptop, make it physically difficult to slip back into your work mode. And here's the key. Boundaries don't work if you're constantly making exceptions.

Justice once becomes the pattern, not the exception. You know, it's time to show up differently. Here's something that took me a  long time to learn.  The intensity and directness that makes you successful in business often destroys relationships at home. When an employee misses a deadline, you might come down hard when your 8-year-old forgets their homework.

That same energy is devastating. You've got to develop different modes. Business mode and human mode, and you've got to get really good at  switching between  them at home.  Listen better, be more caring and understand that if you blow it, you'll never get that time or trust back. Your family members aren't employees who need to hit KPIs.

There are human beings who need your presence, your acceptance, and your love.  So here's the hard truth. If you actually commit to being present for your family,  you will miss some business opportunities.  You'll turn down some deals, you'll pass on some networking events. You might even grow more slowly than you would if you went all in on business, and that's okay because here's what I've learned.

 There will always be another business opportunity. There will always be another deal to chase, another mountain to climb,  but your kid's childhood happens. Exactly. Once your spouse's patience isn't unlimited, your own health and sanity have limits. The question isn't, how can I do everything?  The question is what actually matters most? 

And am I living like it does? So why don't we start today?  The biggest lie business owners tell themselves is I'll focus on my family once I get the business to X. Once we hit a million in revenue. Once we hire a COO, once we get acquired the goalposts, keep moving. Someday never comes. So start today.  Not perfectly.

Just start, leave work at 6:00 PM today. Put your phone away during dinner tonight. Ask your kid about their day and actually listen to the answer.  Small changes compound over time,  and the sooner you start, the more time you have to build something different at the end of your life. The question isn't how successful your business was.

The question is whether you showed up for the people you loved and the moments that mattered. Let's figure out how to do that together. Leave me a comment below and let me know what you think about approaching business differently. And while you're at it, if this resonates with you, click on the link below the video and set a time to talk with me about whether your story will make a good podcast episode at the Long Strange Trip Podcast.

Thanks. This is Josh Patrick.